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Tag Archives: Alps
Slumming it in paradise
Every seasonnaire in the Alps, past or present, has a horror story or two about grotty accommodation. Old chalets so run down that the most cheapskate of guests would sue at first sight, ‘six-bed’ apartments already overcrowded once two of … Continue reading
Mainstream media cover-up – we reveal the truth!
Now, you can call me old fashioned if you like, but I’ve always been under the impression that for information to call itself ‘news’, it has to be kind of …. err ….. new. Ish. Certainly fairly recent. Definitely not … Continue reading
Foot in the crosshairs ……… fire!
Right, you lot. You can stop looking forward to that nice holiday you planned to spend showing friends round your favourite French ski resort. Don’t you realise that what you’re doing is horrifically dangerous? Really, how could you possibly imagine … Continue reading
Nurse! The jacket with the long sleeves please.
So this week I will be mainly having myself sectioned before curling up into a little ball in the corner of a room with suspiciously soft walls and sucking my thumb. Or possibly I should just check myself into one … Continue reading
High tech self flagellation
The Tour de France will not be gracing us with its presence this year, something which you might think is a bit of a disappointment to us all. And indeed it might be if you’re the owner of pretty much … Continue reading
Nothing to lose but your chains
The middle of Les Menuires in February seems an unlikely place for a sit-in, if only because sitting in rather precludes getting out on skis. Seasonnaires aren’t generally the most militant of groups either, being chosen for their laid beck … Continue reading
Gestapo on ice
More symptoms of the galloping infantilism endemic in the UK this week, wth the news that skiers favour a system of speed checks, fines, breath tests and on-piste penalty points in a bid to clamp down on people hooning round … Continue reading
There’s no pleasing some people
This time last year we were all moaning ourselves into an early grave about lack of snow. Grumble, boring, where’s our snow, rubbish season, we’re taking our ball and going home, humph, we all said. Incessantly. Though to be fair, … Continue reading
How to buy a lift ticket. Part II.
I thought I more or less had this covered in last year’s post, but now that the festive hordes have finally turned up after a Christmas presumably spent stuffing their faces at home with the family, it would appear that … Continue reading
Hair shirts for his highness
According to the Royal-watchers this week, the Duke and Duchess of Cambridge have cancelled their ski holiday for fear of upsetting the hoi polloi in advance of impending economic meltdown and subsequent zombie apocalypse. “William and Catherine appreciate that not … Continue reading
It's All Downhill From Here 